May 23, 2014   Cycle Three

 



Hello Everyone and Welcome Back,

I am really glad that you returned to read the blog and check up on how it's going.  The blog has nearly 5,000 views, which is amazing.  I may not be working right now, but I take pride in being responsible to everyone who wants to know what's up with me. 

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That's me in the picture, at chemotherapy this past Wednesday.  My friend came with me and kept me company to pass the time sitting in the chair for about three hours.  It really helps to have the company and I am very appreciative of those who will accept that role. And I will spring for lunch!
FYI, there were a few people who were there already when I arrived, and were still there when I left.  Helps keep things in perspective... 

The end of May marks the end of two months of chemotherapy.  I have four more months scheduled of these treatments, once every three weeks.  Provided we have no reason to stop, we will see what decisions are to be made around the end of October.
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So ,this week after chemotherapy has been a bit rough.  Each cycle has been more difficult than the last.  I am more tired than the last cycle, and my body is not putting up with any extra activity.  Lots of fluids and remembering to eat have helped me maintain as best I can.  I am grateful for powering through it without nausea, and I realize that could happen anytime.

A funny side effect is different taste buds.  The best way to explain it is the feeling one's tongue has after eating sunflower seeds. Like, a LOT of sunflower seeds.  Chemo affects my taste buds buy nearly eliminating my ability to taste altogether for a few days.  Because its unappealing, I don't have a "taste" for food for a few days.  Its not like I want to eat spicy food or anything, I just can't really enjoy the taste of the food I am eating. Eventually it wears off, but its not fun.

Some good things this week included lunches with friends and a few visits and phone calls. I am so grateful for my friends who make me laugh.  I received some great pictures of a new member of my work family (Welcome Delaney!). I made it out of the house to do some errands and use some free coupons.  My friend and I were very lucky with an anonymous free lunch while out in Walnut Creek. We don't know who it was, but our lunch was paid for, and we are truly grateful.   I am always fortunate to have friends who will let me come to their houses and do laundry and watch Hallmark movies and hang out with their doggies. 
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This week, I get to go to the ballpark and watch the Giants play.  Its my first game of the year and I am looking forward to some baseball and sunshine and time with friends.  Hoping to catch the A's game too....

All my love,
Sosa


Just a reminder about the June 8th event in San Ramon.  My parents and I will be there for the butterfly release, and wearing my Team Sosa Tshirt.  Everyone is welcome, and you can RSVP directly to me if you want a free lunch.  Its a picnic so I will bring some blankets and some dominoes.....  This might be a great opportunity for a "company picnic/get together"......

 

May 18, 2014

 

 

 

What a week for me and for Team Sosa!

 



This photo is from a few weeks ago.  I was trying out the sunglasses and scarf thing and I had to double check with my friends to make sure I did it right....
Since shaving my head about three weeks ago, I have experimented with different looks and hats and scarves to see what feels good and looks right.  I find myself beginning a collection of headwear.  And, those who know me, realize I can quickly accumulate items such as shoes and purses, especially when I find something I like.  Uh oh.....

The summer weather makes it easier to go without a head covering at home, but I have to avoid  the outdoors and too much direct heat on my head during chemotherapy.  That includes pool time, which is one of my favorite things in the world.
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My next cycle of chemotherapy is this week and I am preparing for another week of side effects like exhaustion and pain.  I have been powering through them and that is the plan.  This week, I experienced a delayed allergic reaction/side effect to the treatment: hives.  Side effects can occur anytime, and while most happen right away, some are delayed by a few days or weeks.  I have never had hives in my life, and this was definitely something new.  My oncologists gave me medication and my symptoms were relieved quickly.  I looked into forums and online posts, as well as consulted with my mentors/survivors.  Hives and rashes can happen and the delayed side effect can happen two weeks after the treatment day. If you recall, my hair loss started two weeks after my first treament....I hope this is the only time this happens, because it was miserable!

Yet, I must not be selfish and I must keep things in perspective.  Just like the different levels of pain I have experienced so far, there will be different levels of side effects.  I am grateful for medicine and for my body's cooperative reaction with treatment.  This was another bridge to cross, and I was able to get through it. 

I use that attitude to get through the days when I am tired. And to get through the days I wish I could exercise or be more active.  I find myself frustrated with not doing as much daily as I have in the past.  So, this week, I took a long walk and mild exercise.  I usually do a yoga class during the week but my hives prevented that.  It was nice to get out and see how far I could go without being too tired.  It was also good to know my limits, because my body was not sore afterwards, but I was tired, which I think I earned.  While my mind wants to run around the block a few times, my body reminds me that is not a good idea....

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TEAM SOSA did a fundraiser luncheon at work that went very well!! If you have Facebook, you may have seen pictures posted by my work family.  There were approximately 100 people who came out to show support.  There was lots of homemade food created with love by Team Sosa.  These fabulous people wore their Tshirts and coordinated a lovely luncheon in a hot gym and shared good times with people I have worked with, and grown with, over the past 15 years.  I was unable to attend, but I was visited by friends afterwards who brought food and shared the fun times had by all. Including naps on the floor.... The event was supposed to be a surprise, but you know how that is..... 

I am truly grateful for anything that brings my work family together in a positive manner.  Seeing those smiles makes my day, every day.  THANK YOU.
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Occasionally, I get questions about if chemotherapy is working, and "when do we know if you are all better?"  The plan is to continue with chemotherapy for four more months and reevaluate.  While I have reacted well enough to the treament and the side effects, the actual medicine works over time.  It will take time for my cancer to diminish, and we will know more further down the line.  It is important to put faith in God or medicine or oneself.  Results manifest through faith.

I hope you understand that I can meet or talk or answer questions if you think things are worse than they are.  For quite a few people, they need to see my face or hear my voice.  Just let me know.

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Before I sign off, please take look at the post from May 11, Mother's Day.  I posted information about a FREE event in San Ramon on June 8.  I will be there and I invite everyone to attend.  Spend a few hours at the park or stop by and say hello.  This event acknowledges survivors of cancer and I think it will be a great day at the park.  Lunch is free but you must RSVP to eat, and you can purchase butterflies for release if you want.  The groups that sponsor the event work around the Bay Area in cancer research, treatment, and community support.

Love to you all,
Andrea

 

May 11, 2014

Happy Mother's Day

 

 

Hello Everyone,

 

Welcome back and thank you for coming back. It has been a good week of gaining more energy so I can spend time with friends and family.  I was able to do both when I travelled to Reno and watched the last games of the season for Fresno State softball.

 

And I must acknowledge everyone who checked in with me and sent messages and love my way.  This week, my union presented me with a lovely gift and I was able to see coworkers, and let them see me.

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Many of you have asked about the Team Sosa Tshirts. The picture at the top of the blog today is the Tshirt design for Team Sosa.  My dear friends at work made the design and will be placing another order very soon.  Please email me here at heysosateamsosa@gmail.com and I can refer you to those placing the order.

 

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Below is an event on Sunday, June 8, in San Ramon.

It is a FREE event, lunch included, for cancer survivors and their families.

 



I will be attending the event and I am inviting my friends and family to join me.  It will be picnic style, so bring your blankets and chairs or games and enjoy a day at the park with me.  LUNCH IS FREE BUT YOU MUST RSVP.
You may purchase a butterfly (or more than one) for a ceremonial release at the picnic.   You can call 925-933-0107, or,
Here is the link: http://cancersupport.net/events/wings-of-hope-butterfly-release/

Hope to see you there!
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It is Mother's Day weekend, and I spent some time with my parents this weekend.  We watched softball and spent time with friends.  We are glad to see each other when we can, and I know they are always there if I need them.

I hope to spend the next week gaining more energy and strength to get ready for the next cycle.  And work on a project or two.  Hope you all have a lovely week and I will post again next Sunday.

Please email me if you have questions or just want to check in.
Thank you all, every day, for your support.

Love, Sosa

May 4, 2014

May the Fourth Be With You

 

 

Welcome Back Friends and Family,

 

Thank you to everyone who has checked in or messaged me this week.  It means so much to me to hear your support.  It's great to hear about life outside this cancer world.  Sometimes, its the interesting stories from work, or its the general comedy that is our children and friends.  This week, its a silly pink mustache on an old friend, a picture of a another beautiful bald breast cancer survivor, and flowers from Utah. And, as always, its the regular conversation about baseball, the Kentucky Derby, basketball playoffs, and college softball. 

 

On Wednesday, I had Cycle 2 of my first (and hopefully, only, single Round) of chemotherapy. I was accompanied by two of my favorite funny ladies, who made the time fly by.  My side effects have been manageable, mostly fatigue and lightheadedness. My body is responding well to the medications, and I am listening to my body when it tells me to rest.

 

Its been one month since the treatment plan began and I still have five months to go.  That means Cycles every three weeks, and I can only hope each Cycle continues to work on destroying the cancer in my body.

 

This week, I experienced significant hair loss, and shaved my head.  As I said in the last blog post, my hair loss was significant and continued to progress rapidly.  I had discussed the issue with my friends and I was growing more frustrated with losing hair all day long.  On Saturday, after measuring my growing frustration, I made the decision and called a local barber shop. 

 

While it was stressful, two of my friends joined me and made it a lot easier.  I was already feeling overwhelmed from chemotherapy.  But it had to be done.  It is about being empowered, and about feeling better during the hardest times.

 

I do not want anyone to shave their head "in solidarity." I have plenty of friends who are already bald and beautiful.  This week, the "Team Sosa" shirts began delivery, and I am asking for photos of my supporters with their shirts.  I feel the support and appreciation every day in so many ways, and I am truly blessed and grateful.

 

Love you,

Sosa

 

 

April 27, 2014    You Knew It Was Coming

 

 

Hello Everyone,

 

 

Welcome back and thank you, everyday, for reading and returning to this blog. 

I am so fortunate for each comment, email, and view; the blog has been viewed over 3,000 times! You have no idea how much that means to me. I realize some of you return often, and I understand.  I miss you, too.

 

Remember, it is ok to email me or text or ask questions or just check in. 

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Every day, my friends send me inspirational messages through Facebook or via text or email.  I have reposted some of them in my blog entries. My friend, Cat, sent me the picture above.  I definitely needed this one today...

 

Some of the questions I fielded from my friends and family have been about the side effects of chemotherapy. When people think of cancer patients and chemotherapy, they ask about nausea, fatigue, and hair loss.  This experience has provided me with first hand knowledge that I am trying to share with others. 

 

One of the most significant side effects of undergoing chemotherapy is alopecia, or total hair loss. This includes all body hair, including eyelashes and eyebrows.  I have talked about this before, and I knew it was coming.  I did my best to take action and prepare, by cutting off my longer hair.  I also mentally prepared by gathering more knowledge and talking to cancer survivors who dealt with alopecia.  I have scarves and hats and caps to wear as it continues to get worse.

 

With my chemotherapy drugs, I was aware the hair loss would begin about two weeks after my first treatment.  And it did.

 

The last few days, I have been experiencing hair loss when I comb or brush or shampoo my hair.  Its much, much more than the usual 10-20 strands that most people experience every day.  While its something I have done my best to prepare for, it is still sad to see.  When I start to feel bad about it, I reach out to friends, who remind me of what I need to hear:

 

It will grow back....  You look good with hats....  You can get cool wigs, like candy apple red.... You knew it was coming, and you prepared for it.

 

Some of my friends have expressed sympathy or asked questions about prevention.  Most patients lose all their hair; some have thinning, which looks like it sounds.  The American Cancer Society offers a program called "Look Good, Feel Better," which provides assistance, such as wigs and beauty tips, to help with the adjustment.   

 

Now is the time to count my smiles and count my courage.  It is not the time to cry or be scared.  There will be times for that, just not now.  This is another battle in a very long, long war.  This is another way my life will change because of this disease.

 

What does not change are my support system and my positive attitude.  I look forward to messages or visits or lunches with friends.  I have friends who are wearing my name as they participate in walks or runs in support of cancer research.  I have friends who will be there for me as I head into Round 2 of chemotherapy this week.  I am humbled, and stronger, with my TeamSosa.

 

Love You,

Sosa

 

 

 

 

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Some people have had trouble posting on the blog.  I will post for you if you send me your message.  I learned it is easier to post from the computer than your phone.  You can post anonymously (include your name in the post) and from your Google account. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

April 20, 2014        Easter Sunday

 

 

Hello Everyone,

 

So this week, I learned a few things....

 

I learned it takes a lot of energy for my body to deal with side effects, day after day. 

 

I learned my body needed a lot more calories to do a simple yoga class.

 

I learned that even a few hours out of the house can be exhausting.

 

I learned to listen to my body, even when my heart wanted to stay for the second game.

 

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This week I attended my first support group comprised of cancer patients and survivors.  It will be another good resource for me to learn from and communicate with others who have gone through treatment and intend to survive this disease.  I have also been fortunate to meet other women in my field of work whose lives haves been changed by breast cancer.  And, I have been lucky to have friends from all over, connect me with survivors in their lives.  I am grateful for the support, and overwhelmed sometimes by the seemingly infinite ways breast cancer has touched the lives of so many.

 

For more than a few, I am the first person someone has known, on a personal level, whose life is forever changed because of breast cancer.  I am the first person some have known to go through chemotherapy, let alone all the other steps to come.  For some, they do not know what to say or do, and some just want to "fix it all," and make it go away.

 

What I have learned from these friends, is that all emotions are valid, from anger, to doubt, to fear. And, understanding there is no quick fix for any cancer, can be a hard pill to swallow.  My friends, please trust, completely, that your short text, email, blog post, or "like" on Facebook, is a reminder to me that you are out there. While you may not think you know what to do or how to help, even the simplest acknowledgement to me or to someone who is asking about me, helps me in many important ways.

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Yoga was fun, and I intend to participate in classes as often as possible.  But, one must remember to eat something before doing more activity than usual.  This was my first real activity since chemotherapy started and my body was not ready.  My blood sugar was low and I was exhausted! So, I learned a lesson that day.

 

I went to Saint Mary's College (Class of '98) last week to watch Fresno State Softball play the Gaels.  While I hoped to see both games of the doubleheader, I settled for extra innings in the first game.  My body told me I was tired, and within a few hours in the sunshine, I knew I had to head home.  Leaving the sun, and a softball game, are the opposites of everything I have been raised to be. However, I was lucky to see my parents, as well as my friends, whose daughters play for the Dogs.  And, made it to the bookstore for some swag. 

 

I also learned (not really, but we have a theme) that extra innings in a Giants game this early in the season is exhausting for anyone, cancer or not.....

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This has been a fun week for letters and packages and fun pictures from friends and family. Thanks for the positive quotes, as well as the smurfs, the biohazard bags, and the inappropriate wardrobe choices.... I commend those still using US Mail, as I appreciate sending a letter of my own from time to time.

Thank you for your messages and for your visits, and for your consideration of my needs.

 

It's been an interesting week and I just thought I would share some with you all.  This is the second week after my first treatment.  The major side effects of pain have subsided and I am fortunate to feel relatively normal.  Round Two is in a little over a week and I plan to use this time to strengthen my body and mind for whatever is to come.  With exercise and a positive attitude, I am almost completely prepared for what lies ahead.  I say almost, because I am only strongest with your support, your affirmations, your prayers, and your faith. 

 

 

Thank you all so much,

 

Sosa

From Monica R.M.: "The little difference (in people) is the attitude.  The big difference is whether it is positive or negative."

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Lastly, while I have many projects to work one during my time at home, I have binged on seasons of TV shows, and ridiculous movie marathons. If you are inspired, feel free to email me your suggestions for programs I might be missing, because they are soooo fantastic. I have stacks of books yet to be read, but am always up for a browsing of a local bookstore.

My First Chemotherapy, 4/9/14 

 

April 13, 2014

 

Hi Everyone,

 

I would like to start off by acknowledging everyone who checked in with me this week.  Your emails, texts, phone calls, and pictures were much appreciated.  I know I was not much of a talker, but I responded to every message.  I returned daily to past blog and Facebook entries and reread what you have posted, because it helps so much. Having friends and family check in from five minutes or 500 miles away reminds me on an hourly basis of my support, my team.  I am very lucky to be on TeamSosa for this journey.

 

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So this week was my first chemotherapy infusion. The experience itself went well. My parents accompanied me to my first session, and I have spent the last week experiencing side effects and adjusting to medications. Round One included headaches and aches and pains, which were the worst of it. This was different from last week's post surgery pain; this is much harder to manage.  As some of my friends have learned through their own personal injuries, pain interrupts sleep, which makes for long days, and longer nights. Trying to find a comfortable position, using icepacks on sore joints, and taking medications are my current routine.

 

I am most grateful for not experiencing nausea, or worse, vomiting.  I attribute that "gift" to more advanced medications, but also to a bit of willpower.  As an athlete, I have always "played through the pain," but I'm not crazy.  I am a firm believer in "mind over matter" and thoroughly convinced myself that nausea was not in the game plan. And I kept one foot on the floor at all times. 

 

I also have faith that I will always be given only what I can handle.  However, I am realistic, too, because the nausea could very likely come back with a vengeance for the next part of the war. This mentality is the basis of my strength and I surround myself daily with wings of balanced optimism and realism.

 

This will get harder over time, and I am fortunate for every hour of every day that it is easier, every hour of sleep, and each comfortable position I can be in.  Because I do not know what Round Two holds for me.  I am mentally preparing myself for as much as I can before the next wave hits. 

 

Feel free to email me, or post a response, or share this blog with others.  Tell me if there is something you would like me to address or something you think I should say.  I do this for myself, and for my friends and family.  It is not TeamSosa without you.

 

Love to you all,

Andrea

 

 

 

And, yes, mom and dad were here most of the week. We watched the Masters and Giants baseball and Fresno State softball.  Because that's how we roll.  Major life events coincide with sporting events....  There was not much they could do for me other than run errands, and keep me company. I refer to them as the "crazies," and my small apartment is like a cage for their active retired lifestyles. They have since returned to the Central Valley to root on their Bulldogs, of course.  My parents did not leave me "unattended," and they know I have an extensive support system in the Bay Area.

 

 

**Only real Giants fans have their first chemo on the Home Opener.  Yes, I wore all my Giants gear, and brought my 2010 World Series blanket with me.  Even my nurse Barbara wore her Will Clark button.