February 22, 2015

 

 

Aloha Friends and Family,

 

I apologize I was unable to post a picture from my recent vacation, but I will work on it for my next posting.

 

Over the past few weeks, I embarked on a few adventures and spent time with wonderful friends.  I enjoyed the beginning of softball season and helped plan my good friend's wedding.

 

The best part about the past few weeks has been my ability to go somewhere I have never been.  Whats important about the trip is that I could go.  Over the past year, I endured treatment for a disease that is incurable.  Without that treatment, my health may or may not have allowed me to go.  Its entirely possible, I may not have ever known I had cancer until I turned 40.  I planned on taking a trip like this before then, I just had a better reason to go now.

 

I also would not have been able to go without the support of Team Sosa and my traveling friends, "Sunshine and Gemini."  Having their support and encouragement to take this trip was a large part of why I went.  That and a great deal on the flight, of course.  We made lots of memories and ate some great food.  I hope to return again in a few years.

 

Besides my trip, I was able to participate in the Fresno State softball kickoff and see friends and family.  It was great to see the people and the team, especially after I missed the whole season last year.  Barring another treatment decision, I plan to attend games and support the team. 

 

I have been fortunate enough to be of some help to my friend and her upcoming nuptials.  I offered to help, as long as she paid me in lunches. Everything that a friend would do, I have been able to do because I have recovered from the hardest part of treatment.  As my hair grows back, and my energy level increases, I will continue to take on similar activities that I used to do.  Its easier not to think about cancer all the time, when life and living, are both easier to think about.

 

As the anniversary of my diagnosis occurs, I will be faced with treatment options, or adjusting to the continued maintenance of the cancer I live with.  Its all about perspective.  Some days, its less hard to not think about.  Some days, its all I think about.  Some days, I just want to watch TV.

 

Thank you all again for returning and reading the blog.  I appreciate your comments and emails.  Your support has always been so special and I am so blessed every day to have it. 

 

Love, Sosa

 



February 1, 2015

Hello Everyone and Welcome Back,

The end of February marks the one year anniversary of my diagnosis.  Its crazy to think about how much has happened this year and how much my life has changed.

One of the best things that has happened this year is the development of support from my friends.  There are plenty of people who reminded me all year that no one fights alone.  I remember daily text messages to check in, and inspirational quotes and prayers. I received visits and blessings from so many people in my community.  I welcomed new friends and renewed relationships.

My friends showed me their growth and compassion and generosity.  While I learned to accept my diagnosis and unknown future, these people were supportive by keeping me company and listening to what I was facing. 

As this anniversary comes upon me, I reflect on how relationships have grown and become more important.  Some friends have become much closer.  Some friends have distanced themselves for a variety of reasons.  What I appreciate most is those who reminded me that I am still me, no matter how I look.  I thank those who treated me as normal as possible, and didn't forget about me as the year went on. 

I remember the times people were most real with me.  Honesty for some, became easier.  While a lot of people confided in me about their cancer experiences, some spoke with me about other personal experiences.  I am grateful to have been there for friends who needed me as much as I still need them. 

With honesty and compassion comes forgiveness.  Anyone can tell you, I am someone who can be a great friend, but I am in no way infallible.   Cancer doesn't make all your sins forgiven. I still make mistakes.  I say the wrong thing or make the wrong choice for myself.  I fault because I lead with my heart, which means I am sensitive and I take things just as hard. I am grateful for those who are closest to me who can be direct with me when necessary. What should also be acknowledged is the ability of my friends to communicate expectations and forgive.

I surround myself with the best people.  I do not fight alone.

Love, Sosa


My next blog will be February 22, 2015.  I hope you return.