January 25, 2015

living with cancer means doing just that: living with it.

I spent this week running errands, working, working out, and spending time with friends.  I am not in treatment, which means my body can get stronger and handle everyday activities.  Like helping out my mom..... 

A few people have asked me if I am in remission.  I may have talked about this before, but it bears repeating.  After being treated for any kind of cancer, a period of time should pass before it can be considered in remission.  Some survivors even consider themselves cancer free after a period of time.

I have Stage IV breast cancer.  Because of the extent of the disease, I will likely carry some form of cancer in my body for the rest of my life.  If my cancer was caught early and small, it may have been removed from my body completely and I could use words like "cancer free," or "remission."

That is not the case with me.  I currently take maintenance drugs to keep the cancer contained, or inactive.  As my doctors look at regular scans, they will review my treatment options to determine the next logical treatment.  For example, breast cancer and ovarian cancer go "hand in hand. " And since my family has a history of both, my treatment team will review options for preemptive treatment, such as surgery.

One of the greatest weapons in this battle has been education.  I choose to be very informed about my cancer and the development of breast cancer research and treatment.  I seek out answers to my questions about how my disease behaves and how I can continue my quality of life.  With this knowledge, I can share with others who are experiencing cancer in their lives as it happens to loved ones.  Being educated means I can share with you that I understand my disease and its treatment.

I carry this with me every day.  There are minutes and hours where I don't think about having cancer, or what could happen to me.  But, most of the time, I laugh and smile and enjoy the time I have been given.  My perspective has changed, and life is much more clear now.  What helps me most are the friends who are with me on this journey.  I cannot ever express my gratitude for those who are with me every day, and will be there for me when I need them. I can only try to return the favor by being a good friend. 


Love, Sosa

 

January 18, 2015

So this is my current situation..

This week I was brave.  I went without a scarf or hat to cover my head.  In public!

It took meeting with the hairstylist who cut my hair last year, Candace, at Citrus Salon.  You may remember her from one of the first blog entries.  She reassured me that my hair was growing back evenly and healthy. She endorsed some products which I hope will encourage thickness and evenness. She even did a pixie workshop the following day!

I am more comfortable with my hair now than I have been since losing it all.  But it took some steps to be brave.  My head still gets cold, and when I wear a baseball cap, I feel like I look like a boy.  Its not fun to lose all your hair.  

But its not supposed to be.  Its just one more hard thing to deal with and to accept. Its a temporary scar.  There are more battles and scars to come.  It is with the support of family and friends that those battles will be a little easier to fight.  

 So I choose to be brave.

Love, Sosa