December 19, 2016  Happy Holidays

I continue to write this blog to check in with people from home, or from work, or those who want to know what's going on with me but don't want to ask.  Or maybe, feel they are too busy to check in.  For those of you out there, I hope this finds you well, and you are healthy and safe.

Over the past month, I have turned 40 and been very active.  This includes a uphill hike to a long rainy football game and a trip to Vegas for softball.  My time off from work has allowed me time to recover from daily activities, and save my energy for the larger events in my life.

News:

Part of the clinical trial is repeated blood tests to monitor levels.  As a result of taking this medication, I had two blood transfusions.  I suffer from some symptoms which I can see and feel.  The blood tests identify risks that could risk the performance of the drug and my health.  I did not know how common transfusions were until the past month.  So, thank you to anyone who donates blood on a regular or one time basis.  If I did not have these transfusions, my treatment plan would have to change in a not-so-good way.

There has been a significant change in the amount of tumor factor in my body.  It continued to reduce after my last posting.  My medical staff is impressed with the clinical trial medication and support measures to keep me on it.  This is a pill a day with few side effects.  My everyday symptoms are no different from any other person who has joint or muscle pain.  But I do get tired more often, and its important to sleep when possible.  Sometimes that sleep is broken, and not as good as it could be. 

I am also faced with a change in appetite and diet which has been challenging.  I am encouraged to intake 100 grams of protein a day.  This is best from foods and natural sources.  I take advantage of smoothies and protein powder.  Friends have offered advice on how to get all of the protein, including breaking it up throughout the day. This has been the most difficult adjustment, because I used to enjoy lots of different foods.  I am rarely hungry now, mainly full because protein is very filling.  My stomach doesn't growl anymore and I rarely desire any foods or have cravings.

Life is different, and has been for the past few years.  I am feeling more normal now than I have since the beginning. Which is good, because I intend to live and love as much as possible.

I hope to continue improving my strength and health so I can live life as normally as possible.  I remain realistic and recognize limitations.  That doesn't mean I am limited, just that I have to be smart about how much I do. Or the day off to recover. Luckily, my medical staff encourages me to be active and build muscle.

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Last, I recently returned to support group, but due to continued medical appointments, I have missed the past month.  I return this week and I am grateful for it.  There I can share my feelings about the difficulties of living with cancer. I can also share the good things in my life. I can also listen to others with different kinds of cancers and treatment struggles.  This is a good place to get a better perspective on how others deal with cancer and how it changes lives. I highly recommend a support group for cancer patients and groups for caregivers, parents, and children of cancer patients.

At this group, I can talk about the loss of our friend Jody.  She was my age, and the mother of two small children.  Jody was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, and battled treatment for two years.  She was a kind soul and looked great in her wigs.  I spent Mothers Day 2015 with her at the Giants ballpark, and ran into her husband at a rainy football game last year.  She was in regular treatment after her diagnosis, and made the choice to stop treatment.  Her family has always been incredibly supportive and I know her children will be cared for. 

You are missed, my friend.

Love, Sosa